Dr. Bob, Many of my friends are sleeping with their newborn babies. Is this safe? I had always heard that co-sleeping could cause SIDS.
Nancy from Boulder, CO
Co-Sleeping: A Practice Worth Reconsidering
One sleep-related issue that has re-emerged in recent years is co-sleeping—when parents sleep in the same bed as their baby. While this practice may feel natural or comforting, it is important to remember why co-sleeping was largely abandoned decades ago and why medical professionals continue to discourage it today.
Forty years ago, co-sleeping was common in the United States. As sleep research advanced, however, it became clear that bed-sharing significantly increases the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). In response, pediatricians and major medical organizations strongly advised against the practice. Despite these well-established safety concerns, co-sleeping has returned, often framed as beneficial—or even necessary—for healthy development.
Why Do Parents Choose Co-Sleeping?
Unfortunately, these beliefs do not hold up under closer scientific examination.
Bonding does not occur while a baby is asleep. Attachment develops through repeated, responsive caregiving—feeding, changing, soothing, singing, reading, bathing, and showing up consistently day after day. Babies bond to caregivers who reliably meet their needs, not to where they sleep at night.
Similarly, a child’s sense of security does not come from constant physical proximity. While closeness can be soothing, one of the earliest developmental tasks of childhood is learning self-regulation and independence. True security grows from predictable routines, consistent care, and confidence that needs will be met—not from requiring a parent’s presence to fall or stay asleep.
Long-Term Behavioral Concerns
In addition to safety risks, research suggests potential long-term effects. A prospective cohort study led by Zheng Chen* followed children from early childhood into preadolescence. After accounting for early behavior and family factors, the study found that children who regularly co-slept were more likely to exhibit:
- Anxiety and emotional withdrawal
- Aggression, attention problems, and oppositional behavior
These effects persisted into the preteen years, suggesting that early sleep arrangements may influence later emotional and behavioral regulation.
When Co-Sleeping Reflects Adult Needs
In some cases, co-sleeping reflects a parent’s anxiety rather than the child’s developmental needs. While understandable—especially for new parents—this dynamic can unintentionally foster over-dependence and interfere with a child’s growing autonomy. Over time, it may contribute to ongoing sleep difficulties, emotional dysregulation, and unhealthy co-dependency issues between parent and child.
What the Science Clearly Shows
Research consistently indicates that:
- Bed-sharing significantly increases the risk of SIDS
- Co-sleeping is associated with more frequent and persistent sleep problems
- It can interfere with the development of independent sleep and self-calming
- Ongoing sleep disruption may contribute to long-term emotional and behavioral challenges
Children naturally wake during the night. When they are unable to return to sleep without a parent beside them, disrupted sleep patterns can persist for years—for both children and parents.
A Safer, Healthier Alternative
A developmentally sound and safer option is room-sharing without bed-sharing. Keeping your baby in your room for the first few months can offer reassurance and convenience, while still allowing your baby to sleep in their own safe sleep space, such as a crib or bassinet that meets current safety standards.
Healthy sleep habits do not mean withdrawing emotional support from your child. They are about protecting your child’s physical safety, supporting emotional development, and helping families establish routines that work long-term.
*Full Citation
Chen, Z., Dai, Y., Liu, X., & Liu, J. (2021). Early childhood co-sleeping predicts behavior problems in preadolescence: A prospective cohort study. Behavioral Sleep Medicine, 19(5), 563–576. https://doi.org/10.